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The nose. A highly underrated part of the human anatomy. Most people think of it as a silly lump protruding from their face. But it is so, so much more. Did you know that dogs use their wet noses to perceive direction? Or that the nose “conditions” the air by warming and/or humidifying it, before it enters the lungs? And that the human tongue can distinguish only among five distinct qualities of taste, while the nose can distinguish among hundreds of substances, even in minute quantities? Amazing to think what it can do.

But besides all the qualities that this seemingly irrelevant protrubance on our face has, I’ve come to realize that it has one very, very important function for me – without it, I can’t bloody well sing a note, even to save my life. See, I’ve had one of the worst colds I can ever remember recently and it has now gotten to the stage where my nose feels as clogged up as a Dutch girl’s feet. The boys laugh when I sing – I sound like Bob Dylan or Willie Nelson which is not quite appropriate for songs like “Magic Wood”. Unless there’s been a huge downpour and the whole wood is blocked up with water. Which it hasn’t. No, not the way I want to sound at all.

So I’ve taken a leaf out of The Chemical Brothers’ book and have taken to sniffing. No, not the stuff you think. I’m now sniffing nose sprays and within minutes I feel the difference. It’s not BlackMary Nelson. It’s not BlackMary Dylan. It’s BlackMary Mary. I can sing again! Even the high C’s! Hallelujah!

So yes, a great nose is the banner of a great man – and singer, believe me…

BlackMary

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